God Belief V26.2 - Installation Guide

Once upon a time, it was thought the days of God Belief were numbered. However, in recent years it has made something of a comeback...

Despite many pro brain-users' opinion that God Belief is virtually obsolete, retro-chic trend-setters have started a fad for antiquated belief systems and so an increasing amount of users today are chosing to run it alongside their usual existentialist or pragmatist programs.

Most brains are now shipped without any kind of God Belief pre-installed and so, if you want to run one, you will most likely have to install it yourself. In light of this, I have written this short guide to help overcome some of the trickier problems you may encounter. Hope you find it useful.

First of all, before we start, please remember - SWITCH OFF ALL INTERGRATED AND NON INTERGRATED LOGIC SYSTEMS!

The logic circuits of the brain act like a Firewall when it comes to installing God Belief. I know this is obvious to most people, but there are users out there still trying to install a God Belief with logic circuits running. You know who you are.

There are those who will tell you it is possible to install God Belief with logic circuits enabled, but I've yet to see this achieved in practice. Maybe using trimmed-down versions, like God Belief Express, it might be possible. Even then, I doubt it would run for long before you'd start to get the old "Error 666: God Belief 26.2 has encountered a problem and needs to close. We are sorry for the inconvenience" failure.

Once your brain's logic circuits are safely shut down, insert God Belief into your brain and follow the instructions provided. note: God Belief user guides are frequently long-winded, archaically-written and/or containing large passages of user-speak-gibberish. If confused, the manufacturer usually recommends repeated reading (ad infinitum).

Once your God Belief is installed, re-enable your logic circuits and re-boot. You may wonder why enabling your logic circuits doesn't now cause conflicts with God Belief. This is because once it's installed, logic circuits will start to use Backwards Logic. (I don't have time to explain Backwards Logic in this article, but you can find out more about it if you follow this link.)

One of the advantages of God Belief is that your brain will then be compatible with other brains using the same God Belief. Before you try connecting, though, make sure you both have the same version installed (otherwise things can get very messy!).

Good Luck in the Foreverafter!

S

NEXT WEEK: Is Landmark a Virus and How Do I Remove it if I've Become Infected?

The Mind Machine

Even atheists struggle with the notion of the mind as a machine; that we are the sum of our programming. We live according to our assumptions. We don't question them, because if we did that we would never get anything done. The problems occur when the assumptions of two different sets of people conflict.

If, for example, you are brought up with the idea that 'good citizens don't spit', it's difficult not feel angry when you see someone spit on the pavement. Your programming has been so effective, you feel disgust towards the person, as if he'd squatted down and crapped in the street in front of you. Chances are, though, they weren't brought up with that idea that spitting is bad, so they are not aware that they are causing offence. They might even be ignorant of the germs they're spreading.

Atheists frequently argue, myself included, we are perfectly capable of behaving ourselves without religion. We have a value system outside of the church which is just as good as any, if not, better. But where does that come from?

We were given it by our parents and by the society we grew up in. As children, at home and at school, we learned what was acceptable behaviour and what wasn't. So, how did society know? Of course, it was passed on from the generation that went before. Our values can change - they evolve, as technology and scientific understanding changes our way of life, they can adapt to new challenges, such as a conflict with another society, or they can absorb values from other cultures. But on the whole, our values remain pretty steady.

Christians say the Bible is a 'good' book; the 'greatest book ever written'. But they're judging it by the values they inherited from their Christian-based upbringing, or 'programming'. Not exactly unbiased. Muslims will say their book is the greatest but, again, they are judging it by their Muslim-based upbringing (programming).

I've lived in closed societies, such as a small country town or village, where values are rigid and anything outside the norm is considered 'wrong'. I've lived in an open society (London), where there's such a mix of cultures and value systems that people become more tolerant. That's why I prefer urban living.

None of this is particularly Earth-shattering news, but, if we realise our minds are machines, each one programmed slightly differently, it just might help diffuse those potentially explosive situations when two sets of value systems come into contact.

Unlimited Ltd.

Freewill is an illusion. Our brains are only capable of 10 to the power of 70 million million 'actions' or 'thoughts'. Considering there are only 10 to the power of 80 atoms in the visible universe, that's a biggish number. But our minds appear to have limitless boundaries and this is what gives us the feeling we have freewill.

Infinity, on the other hand, is not limited. Well, it is limited - it's limited to being limitless; it can never be limited, the poor thing.

We live in a paradox - infinity can't exist, but then it can't not exist, either.

This is a great conversation stopper at dinner parties.

Next time your other half drags you to his/her friend's house to meet up with a bunch of friends, who have also dragged their unfortunate other-halves along, and the amount of glasses of Sainsburys Australian Shiraz Cabernet (£4.95 reduced from £7.95) consumed equals exactly the right amount to inspire a heated debate on something tediously political, like the occupation of Iraq, which threatens to drag on longer than the occupation itself, simply drop in the old infinity paradox idea at an appropriate point.

Restful silence is guaranteed. Unless your other-half's best mate happens to be going out with Aristotle.

You're a Total Cult!

I feel sorry for new cults. They get all the bad press. Meanwhile, the traditional cults get protection from the law and nationwide uproar if their values are questioned. Christianity is a cult - it's a bloody successful one, too. And those Muslims.

In 1997, someone called Robert Sturgeon listed 10 warning signs you should look out for. Some people, usually likely to be get all hysterical on your ass at the least provocation, think cults are just a few places below paedophiles in the nasty monsters list. Whereas, religions are up there close to hospitals and police stations on the list of things generally considered to be there for the benefit of upstanding and morally correct citizens.

Check those warning signs. I think you'll find they describe every established religious organisation going.