A previously unknown part of the Bible has been uncovered throwing a new perspective on the events which occurred during the birth of Christianity. The old version can be read here (acts 17:22-31).
The newly discovered text has a slightly different version of events...
So Paul, standing in the midst of the Asparagus, said: "I perceive that in every way you are very religious. For as I passed along and observed the objects of your worship, I found also an altar with this inscription, ‘To the unknown god.’ What therefore you worship as unknown, this I proclaim to you. The God who made the world and everything in it, being Lord of heaven and earth, does not live in temples made by Asparagus, nor is he served by Asparagus tips, as though he needed anything, since he himself gives to all Asparaguskind life and breath and everything."
And the Asparagus said, "Human, who calls himself 'Paul', you blaspheme the one that is Green, who gave us Green, who created the world that we may witness the Glory of His Greenness. Repent, oh Paul, repent, you who speak of a false god, who denies the Great Gus, who grows from His Holy Crown, who ever grows 24 inches, even upon the conditions not being ideal. Human, when He is come, it is written the outdoor conditions will be ideal, the weather will be warm, the righteous Asparaguskind shall be picked by Him, each and every 24 hours, and the multudes will join us. First cometh one hundred thousands of square cubits of lettuce, including wild rocket, and Romaine, and redleaf. And the Earth will send forth a legion of crabs, the number being 144,424. And all shall be prepared for the Final Asparagus and Crab Salad, where upon all Asparaguskind will join Him in the glory of his Greenness, and His Light shall shine forever on us and our photosynthesis will be complete. He who denies such will be baked for a thousand years, and his dried bones crushed in His Awesome Pepper Grinder, and the unbelievers bones thus crunched will be used as topping on the Final Asparagus and Crab Salad, to add a nice extra texture. Yay, it is spoken. Argus."
And Paul, listening to all this, replied. "Er... right, well... good luck with that. So I take it you're not really interested in God, then."
And the Asparagus let it be known they were not.
So Paul then had brought forth the inflatable trampoline and before them had it inflated. Then he said, "Now, these are really good. And I can get you them in pink, too..."
And the Asparagus regarded the trampoline as if a wonder.
Monday, May 01, 2006
Paul Addresses the Asparagus
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84 comments:
You're funny. Here's my response to your comment:
You're right, they're beliefs do have a huge effect, that's why we're in this crappy situation. The only answer I can come up with in my sedated state is that fundamentalists need learn that you can have a hypothesis, but you can't have the answer before the experiment -- that wouldn't be an experiment. You have to let the experiment give you an answer. That's what my science mind thinks anyway. Does my analogy make sense?
I mean, your blog, not your inquiry, is funny.
Thanks tav. Problem is, they only want one answer.
If they're going to reject the bits of science they don't like, they should be forced to reject all science - they wouldn't be allowed to buy cars or go to a hospital, for starters. no cellphones or computers.
I think they might soon start to change their inds about evolution....
I think the best example of that hypocisy is to be found on an episode of the Simpsons where an "angel's skelton" was found. Suddenly everyone in town started banning science and rioting at the natural history museum. When a giganitc donosaur bone landed on Moe the Bartender, he yelled, "AH!!! My back! I only hope medical science can cure me!" LOL
hehe
Did you edit out the bit where the Asparagus said:
"Thou shalt dine on us and we shall make thy piss stink of all that is unholy"
?
I should think the trampoline would have been a wonder. I think they're pretty wonderful myself. But then, I also love asparagus (steamed).
I like cheese sauce on my asparagus.
my farts smell like asparagus./
Asparagus... Long lost cousin of man? Determined to take over once more me thinks... GW Bush- Asparagus in a man suit??? Me thinks indeed that this be the case, err not a better conclusion ye can come to. Befuddled as per the reason thou doth speaketh in thus manner? For the reason that one asparagi in flesh doth lurk arears of my person, and whenst I doth speaketh so, it doth come into play a barrier for blocking his perceiving my cerebral goings on... Thou must ALL be with constant scouting of the eye as they lurk all over. And If thou doth fall victim to this most foul conspiracy of the green, I shall shed any yonder hope of encountering thee again...
And all the world was asparagus...
Pass the butter, please.
This science analogy is getting a bit out of hand. It's one thing to not be able to accept bits of the constitution, but there are many different sciences that are completely independent of each other. Anthropology and kinetics? I think you can accept that v=at^2 and not accept that early hominids lived in in heavily forested areas due to hipodont bovid fossils associated with them.
I think you can accept that v=at^2 and not accept that early hominids lived in in heavily forested areas due to hipodont bovid fossils associated with them.
If you do so out of knowledge, not ignorance.
I love dabich, I shall have none say otherwise. But, dabich are you not the living testament to the saying "Ignorance is bliss"?
Learn about evolution. Understand it as well as Darwin. But to dismiss evolution you have to understand it better than Darwin.
I love you too, Simon :)
Maybe ignorance is bliss, but I'll tell you one thing. I'd rather be ignorant and happy than too informed and unhappy like Scribe is. That's just wrong.
You're lucky those unhappy scientists invented all your mod-cons then. Or do you live in a mud hut?
Define mod-cons. Mud hut? No. I live in a house that hubby and I totally renovated, with my own hands. Used tools, of course. And prayed to God that my body would hold up for the six months we had to make it liveable.
Simon, Simon, I never said I didn't give Science credit for anything. I give scientists credit for a lot. We'd all be dead if it weren't for science and medicine and lots of other things. I believe in God and I believe in people being able to figure some things out for themselves. Wish it was more we could figure out, is all.
Quit assuming shit about me, damnit.
I still love you :)
Skip that last, modern conveniences. I was thinking happy pills or something. lol
I give scientists credit for a lot. We'd all be dead if it weren't for science and medicine and lots of other things.
dabich, science gave you those things by a process of rational thinking. A process which includes evolution.
Evolution isn't just some vague notion dreamed up by a few deluded fools. It is very very solid science which has been accepted by the majority of scientists for about 100 years or more.
Creationism (or ID) is not science. This isn't just an atheist opinion. Nearly all Christian scientists accept evolution too.
Your reply is "That all sounds fine but I'm sticking to my beliefs".
Why can't I have a combination of the two, Simon? Who died and left YOU God? Evolution happened. It's STILL happening. OK...BUT, I don't believe we are descendants of primates. Period.
next?
Evolution only really works for those of us comfortable with the concept of oblivion and a complete lack of consequence. We come from nothing and that is how we end up. We are so infinitely unlikely, that any actual experience good or bad is so amazing as to almost be moved full circle back to farse. Some people tell me they find this disturbing and upsetting. I find it comforting. It's because of how i am, and you dabich are how you are. Just as long as no body tells me what my future children can and can't learn at school. That's fundamentalism, and that makes me REALLY angry.
BUT, I don't believe we are descendants of primates.
even though we are 98% = to primates?
Is this because you know or because you want it to be so?
Who died and left YOU God?
What does that mean? Nobody, as far as I'm aware. Care to elaborate?
Why can't I have a combination of the two, Simon?
Didn't say you can't. It just seems a bit strange to me that you pick out specific bits of science you don't like, and dismiss them for no other reason than you don't like them. They offend you, somehow.
The truth is sometimes uncomfortable, isn't it?
thanks for visiting my blog...
hope to hear more form ya =)
Thomp, you said it well. You are how you are, and I am how I am. I won't tell your schools what to teach your children, what to believe, and I don't want anyone telling ME what to believe.
Simon,
I CAN have it both ways, I do now. It's what I choose, and how I live. It is how I am, part of the essence of DaBich.
Bits and pieces that offend me? No, I just don't believe them. Call it intuition, call it instinct, call it choice, call it what you want. That's how it is.
Thomp says:
Evolution only really works for those of us comfortable with the concept of oblivion and a complete lack of consequence. We come from nothing and that is how we end up.
See, I have problems with this. Oblivion? WTF? That's just wrong. And to say evolution only works for those comfortable with it, well, so does beief in God. It only works for those comfortable with it.
And nothing? We come from nothing? Uhhh..yeah, ok. Next.
"Who died and left YOU God?
What does that mean? Nobody, as far as I'm aware. Care to elaborate?"
It means, Simon, that just because someone says it's so, doesn't mean it IS so. Just like you're telling me. Sure, we have know evolution is for real. BUT, HOW DID IT ALL START? Who knows. We guess at it. What we guess doesn't mean it's so.
But in the end, it doesn't matter. We are what we are. We choose to live the way we wish. I choose to live in a decent way from society's standpoint, and when I die, if I'm right, I hope I'm deemed worthy of eternal happiness. If not, then I'm just dead, but at least I lived life the way I chose to, In a good way.
I still think, however, that there is a hereafter. I don't know the how's or the what's, but it's there.
Now where's that friggin Yuengling's??? I wanna beer ;)
thomp is incorrect-acceptance of evolutionary theory does not necessitate acceptance of oblivion.
Of course he's wrong, you don't agree with him LOL
Well, yes that, but also because evolution does not elimiate the role of a supreme being.
Ok, maybe I didn't word that very well. I was refering to evolution as science. Science past this and right back to big bangs and atoms etc... A completely atheist point of view. when you die you become carbon and fish food and nothing else. This is the oblivion of which i speak and I am comfortable with it. Maybe 'oblivion' was too strong a word... I accept that evolution and most of science could be worked into a belief system that includes a god figure, that could make sence. It's when people start to pick and choose parts of science to believe and dismiss That I raise an eyebrow. Like when the jehova man knocks on my door and forcefully insists that a fish eye is proof of god and dinosaurs never existed. I respect anyone who believes anything, just as long as they are willing and able to critically think about what they believe and not deny things on face value.
But in the end, it doesn't matter.
dabich
You're beginning to sound like an atheist. Hooray!
If you accept evolution, then you accept we evolved. It's really dumb to say otherwise.
You might as well believe we evolved from asparagus.
I'm not trying to convert anyone to atheism. I'm defending rational thinking. If you start teaching kids the planet is only 6000 years old, we're heading back to the dark ages.
As Dawkins points out, millions of children are denied a proper education because their parents and/or their school teaches them irrational religious ideas. They're taught 6000 year old planet and a god created all the species as if it's a fact. Dawkins calls it close to child abuse. He has a point.
Smart people like you, dabich, shouldn't be making matters worse by supporting their nonesense.
Simon, in the end it doesn't matter. But you, however, believe we are just dust. There is where we disagree. I believe we have a next life. But in the end, it still doesn't matter, because one way or the other, I live a life as decent as I can. No, I'm NOT perfect, but then, no one is.
As for the evolution thing. Yes, I believe that life evolved, and is still evolving. But, if we came from primates, then why are there STILL primates? THAT is what I have a problem with.
I still believe in God. So...I guess that doesn't qualify me for atheist status. lol
And don't go stroking my ego, it won't get you anywhere ;)
Simon,
Sorry to butt-in, like, but I just wanted to say thanks for visiting my blog and directing me here. Did you write that "Asparagus" thing, or was it penned by the great Douglas Adams himself, perhaps? Seriously though, I presume you came to my blog via http://www.geosus.org.uk and, if so, how did you find it? (and no, I don't mean what did you think of it - although I don't mind more lucid feedback if you can manage it).
Make sure you keep taking the Anger Management pills,
Martin.
Actually, I always thought the "Aeropagus", was the Japanese equivalent of the "Yellow Pages"!
But, if we came from primates, then why are there STILL primates?
I'm no expert on evolution. But this is how I think it works:
A primate's genes change and make him/her slightly more intelligent. This intellegence allows him/her to survive better. He/she mates and all his/her off-spring now carry this gene which makes them more intellegent. Provided with better intellegence, these primates do very well and their better chance of survival allows them to reproduce in greater numbers.
Meanwhile, the original primate species is still there. Reproducing, as before. It's species continues, as long as nothing happens to cause that orginal species of primate to become extinct.
So, now you have the two species of primate, living side by side.
Eventually (we're talking 10000s of years), the new more intellegent primate has the same process occur to it. And a new branch of the primate tree occurs, creating a yet more intelligent species of primate.
Imagine it like branches of a tree - the branches have grown from the same trunk, but they gradually grow away from each other, searching for their own space in which to survive.
Make sense?
martin, Douglas Adams' spirit using me as a vessel with which to continue his work. In a way, he did write this post.
I found your blog by searching for the word "atheist" in blogger. I must check out the site it's related to.
You're no expert? Awww...c'mon, Simon, don't be so modest. ;)
I don't know if I buy that, tho. Of course, it's all speculation, so I guess it doesn't matter.
You're giving me a headache, Simon!!
Yeah, but you're not disagreeing with me, anyway. You say you buy evolution, you just don't get how one species remains after a new species evolves from it.
There's a species of frog that was introduced to Australia about 50 years ago. The frig has become too successful. It has become a plague.
Wondering why, scientists discovered the frogs legs has grown longer (in only 50 years!), allowing it jump further.
But the original frog (from Hawaii) still have the old size legs. So you see - we now have variations of the species of frog existing on the planet at the same time.
One has genes which provide it with long legs. The other has genes which provide it with short legs.
you see, sister dabich? mine apostle thomp hath clarified his postion as I knew he would.
i've said it before and i'll say it again - evolution is a fact. it doesn't matter if you believe in it or not, it doesn't matter if you understand it or not, it's a fact. You may as well say you do not believe in gravity, just because the inverse square law doesn't make sense to you.
In fact, i invite all people who think they can make evolution go away by claiming they don't 'believe in it' to participate in a little experiment: climb to the top of a tall building, close your eyes, believe there is no such thing as gravity, and then jump.
Purely in the interest of science, you understand.
Minister Mine, dost thou believeth that when you kick the bucket, you shall forever more be naught but carbon and fish food?
Simon, well I KNOW evolution is a fact (pppstt Moonflake), I just cannot accept that man came from primates.
And that friggin frog...overpopulating Australia! Send in something to eat them!!
Thomp, keep up the good work, and Minister Scribe will appoint you to a higher position in his Church!! ;)
I just cannot accept that man came from primates.
I'm aware of that. It just don't feel right to you.
dabich,
our bodies, yes.
I found your blog by searching for the word "atheist" in blogger. I must check out the site it's related to
Make sure you do as, almost the first thing you will note is that, we share a fondness for the late Mr Adams.
I had a look martin. I must admit I haven't read HHGTTG since I was about 18 or something. I will certainly do my best to avoid the movie. I thought it worked best on radio.
I personally don't think there is room for religion and science, as you probably guessed. Science is hard, making up stories is easy.
Adams is right - the Universe is a paradox: it can't exist but it must.
God is too simplistic an idea. It's like finding a mysterious parcel. The atheist puzzles over it, the theist wraps it in Christmas paper then declares - 'look, it's a Christmas present!'
Minister, please finish...
"our bodies, yes. " And?
dabich, you are 98% primate. How do you feel about that?
A conspiracy of scientists determined to make you eat more bannanas?
Hey, I love bananas, bring them on :P
Let's not talk about how I feel, you're OBSESSED with how I feel lol
I shall be happy, so long as you don't lump me and my website in the same category as all those Young Earth Creationist nutters.
However - and I hope you will not be offended if I say it - I think your dismissal of a spiritual dimension smacks a little too much of "sixth form philosophy".
Did you by any chance have a bad experience of Christianity in your formative years?
Christians just can't help being patronising, can they? And yet they are the ones talking to their imaginary friend.
It's so repetative: you can't discuss anything unless you've read a shit load of philosophical books, and the Bible and whatever other nonesense.
I don't dismiss a "spiritual dimension" - which sounds like a fun idea. Religious people throw this stuff in in a desperate bid to cling on to some hope that their belief isn't entirely silly.
But I read the Bible and it's just, well, silly, to be honest.
Apart from the stuff that is just basic human common sense. But don't pretend Jesus invented common sense, please.
If religious people didn't behave in such a pompous, self-righteous manner - and even when you are desperately trying to be "cool" and "in with the kids" you don't fool anyone.
Religion sucks, man. You're coming at the problem with a picture already in your head and you're trying to fit everything to your picture.
Yet every footstep of progress has come about by people discovering what is actually true. Not trying to muddle everything into a fixed idea.
And when the logic fails to stand up, the religious implore me to read their book "You'll get it about half way through".
Erm, why, what happens? Did anyone see Derren Brown "program" ordianry citizens to spontaneously comit an armed robbery?
People come to believe in the Bible with exactly that kind of spontanaiety.
"I was reading the Word of God and suddenly I saw His Love in the World".
Oh really? Amazing. Just reading some words and your hear this god speaking direct into your heart. Who'd a thought it.
If someone actually came across something spiritual when they weren't looking for it, then it might be worth a look. And I don't mean "Oh, I've seen the light!"
By the way, anyone brought up in a religious state is programmed to go looking for god. So even so-called atheists who have been fighting religion only to see the Truth, one day, don't count.
My friend from communist East Germnay and his East German friends don't think about god - ever. He doesn't figure in their minds. They weren't programmed to think about him.
They are truly god-free, the lucky sods.
dabich,
and I believe the go-essence that we believe is "us" returns to a state of collective energy.
And what does this collective energy do then? Explode?
first, that should've been "Ego-essence," and second, it recycles and re-distributes itself.
Scribe, how nice and pat, just like afterlife.
you consider stemming from a singular source that has become corrupted by human ego to be "pat?"
I call "redistributing" your psyche delusional.
Simon,
Those "anger management pills", are clearly not working.
Christianity is not a religion. Religions are all about obeying rules (salvtion by works). Christianity is about acknowledging human imperfection and accepting unmerited divine forgiveness (salvation by faith).
However, "because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists" (Hebrews 11:6), you atheists are a bit buggerred.
Christianity is not a religion.
What??!!
I like angry - like Rotten said, angry can be a very positive emotion.
(some) Christians are trying to make out everything is lovely. Nature doesn't look lovely to me. Neither does this Earth, nor the rest of the Universe.
Is the plague a gift of your god, Martin? Are people slaughtering tsunamis divine? Have you ever seen someone with his head blown off by a shotgun? It's not pretty or godly - the head literally disintegrates.
Oh, you can have blokes in nice frocks. You can write books with pretty lettering. You can even get some craftsmen to put lovely coloured glass into a sweet little picture. But you can't hide reality.
Reality isn't all a horror show. But don't try to make out there's anything spiritual going on.
The Universe is amazing. Awe inspiring. Mind boggling. And totally heartless.
A guy can be walking down the street, wondering whether to paint his hall white with a shade of pink, or just classic white, then... he walks out in front of a bus. All his dreams reduced to guacamole.
It ain't like the movies. Oh no. No noble last words to your loved ones. Splat. Bits of you all over the shop.
Is that what your god's about then?
Don't be silly.
Who said anything about a psyche??? You did. I think the psyche ceases to be.
Simon,
I can see why you got a job as a screenwritter - all very full of energy and emotion! As for me, I am scientific, probably too unemotional most of the time...
As for the unpleasant underbelly of the natural world, that's old news I'm afraid that proves or disporoves nothing. However, why is it that we think things like a cherry tree in blossom is beautiful; what does "beautiful" mean in your "blind watchmaker" cosmos?
As for "sh1t happens to nice people", what happened to Jesus wasn't exactly pleasant; you can't blame the God for the mess his children make of their playground. Personally, I think you've watched The Matrix a few too many times, or did you write it?
As for Christianity is not a religion; I believe I went on to explain what I meant well enough for most people to understand. However, please note that I am referring, there, to Christianity, not Churchianity.
Scribe ~ Ok, Our "ego-essence" does a big bang then, and redistributes itself"...uhh..yeah. OK...and you say *I* believe in fairy tales OK. FINE.
:P
Simon ~ Watch it, dude. Nature *CAN* be very beautiful. A sunset, a gurgling creek (like the one behind my house), flowers, animals, ALL are beautiful.
This is NOT nature: "A guy can be walking down the street, wondering whether to paint his hall white with a shade of pink, or just classic white, then... he walks out in front of a bus. All his dreams reduced to guacamole."
That's HUMANITY, not nature. Sure, tsunamis and hurricanes are not beautiful. But there is a lot THAT IS beautiful.
Martin Lack ~ Some good points there. CHRISTianity, not CHURCHianity. See, I have a HUGE problem with the Roman Catholic Church. Too many organized religions suck. BUT...that doesn't take away my belief in God.
martin, belief in a god is purely emotional. There's no logic to it.
The stories of Jesus and all the other gods are nice stories, with many shared ideas. As a professional story writer, which includes studying and analysing stories, I see man's hand at work.
Taken literally, the Bible is flawed. The last one I read didn't get me past 3 pages before it had contradicted itself. If not literal, it's merely a philosophical work on the nature of mankind, full of all the best dramatic devices - revenge, love, anger, greed, redemption etc...
However, why is it that we think things like a cherry tree in blossom is beautiful; what does "beautiful" mean in your "blind watchmaker" cosmos?
It's a good question, albeit loaded from your point of view. You think it indicates a soul.
I was talking to a scientist friend of mine last night in the pub and we were wondering what the soul is. Assuming that the brain is purely physical, why do we dislike something if it is souless - ie: mechanical and characterless.
If we are just machines, why do we care?
I was talking about Blade Runner and the moment when the android discovers her memories are programmed. I used to view this as the difference between robots and humans. Recently, I realized it's actually about us - when we discover we are machines and our personality is really just programming - very very sophisticated programming.
There are deep-rooted reasons why we see things as beautiful and we don't trust things which are souless.
It would take a 1000 books to describe why this is a physical process, but religion or god-belief can do it in a few words: it's spirituality, innit - science is complicated, art is simple.
Why can't beauty be a chemical/neural process in the brain?
For example, we are, to a certain extent, programmed to feel affection towards certain animals.
Take monkeys. Our culture has taught us to see them in a friendly, cute, cuddly, amusing way. Other cultures see them as food. Their stomachs rumble when they think of a nice monkey steak with fries.
We've been programmed differently.
What is beauty? It's the things we see which make us feel good about life - like a cat sitting next to a warm fire, purring. A healthy person is more attractive to the opposite sex (normally) for obvious reasons.
Why is a sunset or a blossoming tree beautiful? Did your parents say to you when you were 1, 2, 3, 4 years old "Look at the beatiful tree/sunset"? Establishing the idea of what is beautiful in your mind (programming).
A blossoming tree is beautiful for obvious survival reasons - winter is over and there will be nuts and berries to eat. More animals to hunt.
A sunset? Our moods are lifted by good weather, also for obvious reasons.
I feel sorry for you Simon, do you enjoy anything? :/
Why do religious people feel the need to feel sorry for perfectly happy atheists?
So, I enjoy looking at a blossoming tree - that doesn't mean your bloody god exists does it?
No, no, you have it all twisted. The way you word things here, you see everything literally in such a generic way. I hope you DO enjoy blossoms and sun and wind, and everything. You just make it sound like you DON'T! And I'm NOT f*cking religious, damnit lol.
I'm the most irreverent believer in God I know.
ok, god-believer, I'm a realist and a romantic. Is that such an odd combination?
I guess not. Just sometimes you make things sound so freakin bland!!
Bland, why, because I think we're all machines? Because I think our minds are "programmed"?
Doesn't seem bland to me - the Universe is bloody mind blowing.
See, that's my point - the actual, real universe if far more exciting and interesting than this god stuff.
You got people working out the Universe might need more than one dimension to allow it to exist, for example - is that bland?!
What's wrong with being a machine? I love being one.
I don't buy all this hippy bullshit about man being at odds with nature - we are nature. The machines we create are part of the machines nature created.
It's brilliant!
Then people go an lobotomize themselves with all this Jesus crap.
No, Simon, I'm a DINOSAUR, not a friggin machine! Damnit!
I love it when you go off! LOL
We all go off eventually, that's why you should always check the sell by date.
But, but...
I'm WAY past that date...
I'm a dinosaur, remember ;)
Simon,
The phrase that comes to mind here is "So long and thanks for all the Fish".
Even though I now think this discussion is futile (but it's your fault for "dropping one" in my blog), I am grateful to you and your fellow correspondents for an amusing sideshow.
However, I think that you and I are really a bit too old to be engaging in this kind of chat-room / social netweorking stuff; which seems to me to be the cyberspace equivalent of lion cubs learning life skills by play-fighting.
Now, if you will excuse me, I must go and post some hateful messages on a Ballymeena site...
Martin.
Religion is the amusing sidewhow, martin.
It's funny, because you guys are supposed to be the passionate ones, but everytime I have a debate about your religion, you always leave first, saying "Ah well it's all futile".
In other words, because you won't buy my irrational god story, I'm off.
There you go again, Simon, going off again lol!!!
Martin, don't go away, I'm enjoying the commentary.
It's martin going off again (I forgot to put the speech marks in)
I didn't say I was not coming back and, for the record, use of the term "sideshow" was not meant to demean anybody or their blog. It is just that, since I have a wife and kids that demand my attention at home, and since we cannot get broadband in the depths of North Yorkshire, I find myself limited to blogging from the office...
But just how do the rest of you guys manage to spare so much time for this "game"? Simon, I take it you are self-employed, and work from home with the advantage of broadband)?
By the way the reason the Christians may argue with you is because the Bible tells them, "Answer a fool according to his folly, or he will be wise in his own eyes" (Proverbs 26:5). Whereas the reason they may give up arguing with you is because it also tells them, "Do not speak to a fool, for he will scorn the wisdom of your words" (Proverbs 23:9).
How about that for having it both ways?
dabich wants her cake and she wants to eat it too - typical of a Christian.
I'm supposed to be renovating my house, Martin, and writing a screenplay for someone. This is so much more fun though.
Yeah, I got broadband, and a whole load of music royalties to pay for it!
lucky me eh?
I think that pretty much proves god doesn't exist - here I am, a god-denying blasphemer, living a life of total freedom.
I expect you think I'm going to pay for it in the afterlife, though...
Simon says "dabich wants her cake and she wants to eat it too - typical of a Christian."
That's bullshit and you know it. Sure, I admit I want my cake and eat it too, but if anything, I'm ATYPICAL for a Christian. When someone refutes something you say, you throw slurs. How typical of an Atheist.
If nothing else, I'm too damn honest for my own good.
You're right Martin. I'm at work, so I'm going to work.
My apologies to all those of you ("dabich" included) that are of the female persuasion; my use of the term "guys" is almost inexcusable in these enlightened, politically correct, times: However, notwithstanding the self-negating nature of double negatives… "I didn't mean nothin' by it"!
I guess the absence of a response from Simon must mean he is re-filling his wallpaper stripper or something but, whatever, it's time for me to go home now to work on the garden...
Given my qualifications, I may be being paid a pittance for a 9-5 job, but I can't complain about having a third of an acre garden (except, that is, for the fact that I can't afford to pay someone to re-landscape it for me).
Speak more tomorrow.
" Speak more tommorow"... I was clearly far too amused by myself there and, in my haste, omitted the all important " ? ".
hello martin
I was covering over a fireplace in the dining room actually
Simon,
Hope the fireplace job went OK. Despite all the rain I got a surprisingly-large amount of work done in the garden. However, I have just had a scarry thought - are you an Simon Carr one in the same person? But of course; you cannot be because he does not live in London.
Martin.
Martin, don't mind me, I'm just one of the guys... ;)
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